Saturday, January 14, 2012

on broken heart

In the process of growing up and growing old, I learned one important lesson that I'd never thought I'd overlooked.

The lesson I learned, is that it is very important to keep the heart in one piece.

Because it requires a rather complicated process to put everything back together once the heart breaks into pieces. Whereas it needs nothing more than a glue to put the pieces of torn or broken things back together, that’s not the case with the heart.

In putting back the pieces of broken heart, one has to undergone a complicated procedure, which involves a thorough examination of one’s deepest part of the heart and one’s reflection in the mirror. That, is never an easy task since it requires honesty and a strong willpower to stand whatever one finds there, at the heart, and in the mirror. Small steps are to be made following the examination, and they are completely depends on the cases one has. One should not copy the steps others made in putting back the broken pieces of the heart, because it’s a different heart. Forcing similar treatment to two different hearts may lead to a failure and sabotage the whole recovery process. In worst cases, it breaks the heart even more. Thus it is very important, on top of everything, before developing any recovery plans, to appreciate and accept the heart one has, the way it is. Flaws are to be acknowledged only and not to be judged. Judgment and logic are to be used at minimum, since the two tend to have nonconstructive effect on the heart, especially during recovery process. Only by accepting the uniqueness of one’s heart can one understand the way to mend it.

As for the timeline, it is better not to set any. Unmet deadlines will cause another potential wound at the heart, which is highly unwanted because the newly recovered heart have not gain its full strength yet and is rather fragile. Thus, avoid deadline. Let the heart decide. One should be able to tell whether the heart is fully recovered or not, from the way it beats in certain occasions or on meeting certain people. This is a knowledge which only the owner of the heart has access to. Thus, it is also important to keep other people’s advice at minimum. It’s a work one has to do alone, or rather, with one’s own heart alone, without external influence. External influence is also to be kept at the minimum in order to maintain a healthy sense of self confidence and a healthy dose of trust needed by the heart, which can only be given by the owner itself.

Now, I think I should end my musing on the importance of keeping a heart in one piece, and leave the conclusion to you. Is it really that important to keep the hear in one piece? Or is it really that difficult to mend a broken heart? Or should we all just plaster our heart, lock the doors and throw away the key and seal all the windows?

It would be greatly appreciated if you could share any conclusions you have made, since I haven’t been able to make any. Oh I've tried. Really. But none of them seems to make sense, I wonder why. 

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